Funny Simpsons Quotes DefinitionSource(google.com.pk)
Lisa: Do we have any food that wasn’t brutally slaughtered?
Homer: Well, I think the veal might have died of loneliness.
-The Simpsons, “Faith Off”
Homer: Hello… My name is Mr. Burns. I believe you have a letter for me.
Clerk: Okay, Mr. Burns, uhh, what’s your first name?
Homer: I don’t know…
The Simpsons, “Blood Feud”
I can’t take his money. I can’t print my own money. I have to work for money. Why don’t I just lie down and DIE?
-Homer Simpson, “Half Decent Proposal”
To alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems.
-Homer Simpson, “Homer vs. the Eighteenth Amendment”
Pff, English. Who needs that? I’m never going to England.
-Homer Simpson, “The Way We Was”
Damn it, Smithers, this isn’t rocket science; it’s brain surgery!
-Mr. Burns, “Treehouse of Horror II”
Marge, you’re my wife, I love you very much, but you’re living in a world of make-believe! With flowers and bells and leprechauns and magic frogs with funny little hats.
-Homer Simpson, “Blood Feud”
Unshrink you?! Well, that would require some sort of a re-bigulator, which is a concept so ridiculous, it makes me want to laugh out loud and chortle, hmm-hey—ahh, but not at you, O holiest of gods, with the wrathfulness and vengeance and the blood reign and the hey, hey, hey, it hurts me.
-John Frink-like scientist in the world Lisa creates, “Treehouse of Horror"
Oh, boy, sleep! That’s where I’m a Viking!
-Ralph Wiggum, “Lisa the Vegetarian”
Now, look, boy. If your da goes ga-ga, you just use that…shin of yours to call me, and I’ll come a-runnin’. But don’t be readin’ my mind between 4 and 5.That’s Willie’s time!
-Groundskeeper Willie, “Treehouse of Horror V” (easily the best Halloween episode)
Todd: Is he killing that guitar, daddy?
Ned: Yes, son…
-The Simpsons, “Faith Off”
Trent Steel: You like Thai?
Homer: Tie good. You like shirt?
-The Simpsons, “Homer to the Max”
Nobody snuggles with Max Power. You strap yourself in and feel the G’s!
-Homer Simpson, “Homer to the Max”
Don’t blame me; I voted for Kodos.
-Homer Simpson, “Treehouse of Horror VII”
I think Bart’s stupid again, Mom.
-Lisa Simpson, “Bart the Genius” (that’s my mom’s favorite Simpsons quote)
Fat Tony is a cancer on this city. He is the cancer and I am the... uh... What cures cancer?...
-Chief Clancy Wiggum, “Bart the Murderer”
Marge: Well, Lisa is now a horse and Bart is dead.
Homer: Well, me saying sorry isn’t going to fix things.
Marge: The gypsy said it would!
Homer: She’s not the boss of me.
Oh, “meltdown”. It’s one of those annoying buzzwords. We prefer to call it an “unrequested fission surplus”.
Bart: How would I go about creating a half man–half monkey type creature?
Ms. Krabappel: I’m sorry, that would be playing God.
Bart: God, schmod, I want my monkey-man!
-The Simpsons, “Bart’s Friend Falls in Love”
Lisa: I think it’s ironic that Dad saved the day while a thinner man would have fallen to his death.
Bart: And I think it’s ironic that for once Dad’s butt actually prevented the release of toxic ga—
-The Simpsons, “King-Size Homer”