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Monday, 10 June 2013

Beer Quotes Funny

Beer Quotes Funny Definition

Source(google.com.pk)
“You can only drink 30 or 40 glasses of beer a day, no matter how rich you are.” - Adolphus Busch
“Drink triple, see double, and act single” – Anonymous
“Getting stoned just makes you want to eat and get fat. At least drinking too much makes you vomit which makes you thin”. Earl J. Hickey
“And smoking weed kills your brain cells, not like getting drunk which only hurts the liver, and you got two of them”. Earl J. Hickey
“Prohibition makes you want to cry into your beer and denies you the beer to cry into.” - Don Marquis
"In my opinion, most of the great men of the past were only there for the beer—the wealth, prestige and grandeur that went with the power." - A.J.P. Taylor, British historian, 1984
“Whiskey and Beer are a man’s worst enemies…but the man that runs away from his enemies is a coward!” - Zeca Palomino (Brazilian song writer)
“Buy a man a beer, and he wastes an hour. Teach a man to brew, and he wastes a lifetime.” - Charles Papazian
"Beer he drank - seven goblets. His spirit was loosened. He became hilarious. His heart was glad and his face shown." - from the Epic of Gilgamesh, 3000 B.C.
“If you resolve to give up smoking and drinking, you don’t actually live longer; it just seems longer.” - Clement Freud.
“There’s nothing like good food, good beer, and a bad girl.” - Harvey Allen
“And God said, ‘Let there be beer!’ And He saw that is was good. Then God said, ‘Let there be light!’ And then He said, ‘Whoa-too much light’.” - Frank Varano
“Beer may not solve your problems, but neither will water or milk” - Wiley
“The church is near, but the road is icy. The bar is far, but we will walk carefully” - Russian Proverb.
“On some days, my head is filled with such wild and original thoughts that I can barely utter a word. On other days, the brewery is close.” - Frank Varano
“Milk is for babies. When you grow up you have to drink beer.” - Arnold Schwarzenegger“Don’t bother trying to join the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms. It turns out they are apparently against all three.” - Wiley
“Women and drink. Too much of either can drive you to the other” - Michael Still
"A fine beer may be judged with only one sip, but it's better to be thoroughly sure."
“Fermentation may have been a greater discovery than fire” - David Wallace
“Who does not love beer, wine, women, and song remains a fool his whole life.” - Carl Worner
“Men can go wrong with wine and women. Shall we then prohibit and abolish women?”
"A little bit of beer is divine medicine." –Paracelsus, Greek physician
“Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy” - Benjamin Franklin
“An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with fools.” - Ernest Hemingway
"It was a natural as eating and to me as necessary, and I would not have thought of eating a meal without drinking beer"- Ernest Hemingway
"The worst thing about some men is that when they are not drunk they are sober." - Yeats
“You can’t drink all day if you don’t start in the morning.” On label of Founder's Breakfast Stout
“The human intellect owes its superiority over that of the lower animals in great measure to the stimulus which alcohol has given imagination.”-Samuel Butler
“When I drink, I think; and when I think, I drink.” –Francois Rabelais
"Fermentation may have been a greater discovery than fire" -David Rains Wallace
" Beer is a wholesome liquor…..it abounds with nourishment" –Dr. Benjamin Rush “There is no strong beer, just weak men” - Dan Castellaneta.
"I fear the man who drinks water and so remembers this morning what the rest of us said last night" –Benjamin Franklin
"I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks." –Joe E. Lewis
“History flows forward on rivers of beer.” Anonymous
"I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me." - Winston Churchill
“When I heated my home with oil, I used an average of 800 gallons a year. I have found that I can keep comfortably warm for an entire winter with slightly over half that quantity of beer.” – Dave Berry
“Wow, it’s like I’ve died and went to heaven. But then they realized it wasn’t my time yet. So they sent me to a brewery. – Peter of Family Guy
"Here’s to alcohol, the cause of-and solution to-all life’s problems". – Homer Simpson
"I am a firm believer in the people. If given the truth, they can be epended upon to meet any national crisis. The great point is to bring them the real facts, and beer." — Abraham Lincoln
"Beer is a wholesome liquor…..it abounds with nourishment" –Dr. Benjamin Rush
"I fear the man who drinks water and so remembers this morning what the rest of us said last night" –Benjamin Franklin
"You can never buy beer; you just rent it" -Archie Bunker
“Smithers, this beer isn’t working. I don’t feel any younger or funkier.” - Mr. Burns of Simpsons
“Beer will change the world. I don’t know how, but it will” - sign on streets of New York
"The sum of the matter is, the people drink because the wish to drink." -Rudolph Brand
"Bart, a woman is like a beer. They look good, they smell good, and you’d step over your own mother just to get one."- Homer Simpson
"On victory, you deserve beer, in defeat, you need it."-Napoleon
"The easiest way to spot a wanker in a pub is to look around and find who’s drinking a Corona with a slice of lemon in the neck." – Warwick Frank
"Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink."-Lady Astor to Winston Churchill "Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it" -Churchill’s reply
"People who drink light beer don’t like the taste of beer; they just like to pee a lot" Capital Brewery, Middleton, WI
"It’s better to drink beer and talk stupid, than to drink water and be full of shit."… ….Steve Taylor